Studies have shown that almost 100% of men have visible penises – Part 1


largeStudies have also shown that Taylor Swift is mostly about relationships and not about country music at all. 

I’ve always viewed my life as a constant struggle to balance the lemons that get thrown at you, with.. erm.. puppies? Because who doesn’t like a nice, sweet little puppy right? Just picture life as a scale, on one side are all your problems and on the other, the things you do that make the problems go away. 

Screen shot 2014-08-25 at 10.00.47 PM

This was how my scale looked like 10 years ago. Now, my scale looks something like the below:

Screen shot 2014-08-25 at 10.19.31 PM

You realize that with age comes a different, more serious set of problems. Also, you might think that being young and having a longer period ahead of you, there will be quite a shitload of anxieties to maneuver through but the fact is, the uncertain future just gets more and more uncertain (and more and more crucial) the older you get. You can also see that the puppies are really struggling here. This is very bad for the puppies… very bad indeed. 

To balance the scale, I can always buy more clothes, ice-cream, new hobbies and maybe 101 dalmatians, but then, this would also increase the weight of my money problems which would eventually tip the scales again. So even if I have a constant stream of money coming in, it’s not exactly the perfect long term solution. 

The reason why I decided to take on online dating actually stemmed from very practical concerns. I figured that if I could build a solid, supportive relationship with someone else, it would be a financially productive and long term solution for some of the big lemons that life throws at you. 

Screen shot 2014-08-25 at 10.05.13 PM

To build a solid and supportive relationship, the first step (and actually what I consider the easiest step) would be to make a connection with someone, and that’s where online dating comes in. With the initial anonymity, it is easy to reach out and make connections with a large number of people. Its what comes after that is the tough part, but that, I will touch/punch on later. 

So, this is a story about online dating, basically. 

To write this, I decided to research on a couple of relationship related articles. I found out that there is generally a standard structure for these types of things, and it goes something like this:

1) an interesting research finding that also headlines the article

2) a unique analogy about relationships in general

3) findings and learnings you should be acquainted with in order to be successful at a relationship. And general mind fucking about how everything you believe in is wrong. You know what’s right? Exactly the opposite of all the things you believe in, it’s really that simple, THE OPPOSITE?! WHO WOULD’VE THOUGHT RIGHT?!

4) An ambiguous conclusion. Meaning, no conclusion. 

(Disclaimer: I have to state here that I DID NOT experiment with/exploit the online dating platform as research for storytelling purposes. I went on the platform because I genuinely wanted to find a SO; the purpose of this article is to share about some of the learnings I’ve gained after the experience to serve as a personal reminder to not make the same mistakes again. And seriously, there is no way I could have spent so much effort just for storytelling purposes.)

And here’s the rest of the article, nicely classified into 4 neat sections for your comprehensive understanding 

1) an interesting research finding that also headlines the article

Do you know, studies have shown that almost 100% of men have visible penises?

(To be continued…) 

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